ISSUE 2
Ben Harper : Both Sides of the Gun (Rock)
Ben Harper’s ninth released album, Both Sides of the Gun, offers a double helping of material with two cds featuring two distinct sounds that show very different faces of the Californian musician.
Side one presents a heaping well of something that Harper has all but mastered: the sad song. Nine tracks are dedicated to the sweet sounds of a wallowing heart, making it the ideal companion for the freshly dumped (or any other brand of blues, really). The cd begins beautifully with rich instrumentals of “Morning Yearning” emphasis to Harper’s gentle lilt and acoustic guitar. The lush sound of the string section makes a few more appearances throughout the side, adding the longing sound to “Waiting For You”, and filling out the simple voice/piano skeleton of “Happy Everafter In Your Eyes” with a certain majesty.
Other songs are more instrumentally simplistic, with “Never Leave Lonely Alone” containing a tweaked and strummed guitar, along with a piano that gives it a quirky air, like an old man ambling down an empty sidewalk. “Picture in a Frame” manages to get a little more worked up, with a chorus of crashing drums and rallying guitars, and Harper abandoning his voice’s tender inclinations for a moment of lung-filling despair.
True, a lot of the songs could easily run into one another without a great deal of notice; the subject matter doesn’t leave a lot of wiggle room as far as tone and tempo goes. Luckily, the second side of the album shakes things up, offering a glance at the funkier, politically opinionated side of Harper.
As the first song (“Better Way”) kicks in, the rhythm takes on a heartier pace. Rattling maracas build up the momentum for the rest of the album, asHarper positively yells out his messages by the end of the song. His voice runs free from this point on, wailing with melodious passion unseen on the previous side.
The politically-infused “Black Rain” features a funky twang and a strut-worthy beat that adds to its rebellious message, with Harper demanding “I’m not a desperate man, but these are desperate times at hand” like the reincarnation of the Black Panthers. This funk attitude is echoed in the track “Both Sides of the Gun”.
The blues/rock laced tracks of side two make it a sharp contrast to the mellow acoustic strumming of side one, though the lack of mix tends to give it an all or nothing feel. Perhaps the shuffle key could be put to good use here…
Price: $14.96
Pink : I'm Not Dead (Pop)Pink is alive and kicking with the release of her fourth album, I’m Not Dead, already managing to cause a controversial ruckus with her first single, “Stupid Girls”. Both the song and the video effectively (and hilariously) insult all the other girls in Pink’s pop genre (“with their itsy-bitsy doggies and their teeny-weeny tees!”) along with any other ditz that stands within hearing distance. The song itself is entertaining enough, with witty one-liners mingling with a catchy chorus.
After working so hard in the first song to separate herself from other girls, Pink never quite determines what she’d rather be seen as, creating an eclectic mix of tracks that are all over the map. Her tough girl image shines through in all its braggart glory in “Cuz I Can” (“tonight I’ll do what I want, cuz I can”) and the anti-bar-sleaze anthem " U and Ur Hand", where Pink growls her threats at any unfortunate unworthy staring in her direction.The rough image is knocked off kilter by songs like “I Got Money Now” that find Pink practically lamenting her wealthy-but-lonely state with low-key guitar and keyboard, along with a voice free of its previous boasts.
No Pink album is complete without the adolescent issues that plagued what should be her distant past; “Conversations With My 13-Year-Old Self” satisfies all your teenaged angst requirements, full of epic instrumentals and brooding memories.
Pink’s attempt at a more political image starts off harmless enough (who hasn’t taken a dig at Bush in the last month?), with only an acoustic guitar to accompany her melodic, subdued voice (helped along by the Indigo Girls). It all turns a little ridiculous though, when the pop star repeats the phrase “Let me tell bout hard work!” several times without a hint of irony (two songs later she brags that she could fit your house in her swimming pool).
Despite all this, a few bright points of the album manage to stand out, like “Who Knew”, her rumoured second single that ties together charming verses with a hook-filled chorus that will have you singing along if you aren’t careful. Another keeper is “Leave Me Alone (I’m Lonely)”, with its equally magnetic chorus and its light-hearted guitar base creating an overall appealing pop parcel.
Although Pink might be a little confused on where she stands in the midst of the land of pop, she still knows how to rock a catchy chorus, which is all we ask of her, really.
Price: $13.96
Yeah Yeah Yeahs : Show Your Bones (Alternative Rock)Yeah Yeah Yeahs exploded onto the alternative music scene with their 2003 album, Fever To Tell, earning high praises for their innovative sound. With Nick Zinner’s guitar alternating between anchoring bass-rhythms and spiralling screeches, backed by Brian Chase’s steady, galloping thumps, and tied together with Karen O’s yelps, yowls and screams, it was clear the New York trio were made of the right stuff, even if the mainstream wasn’t quite ready for them.
Three extremely long years later sees the triumphant return of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs with their second album, Show Your Bones. “Gold Lion” is already making ripples through the radio sound waves as their first single, offering a taste of what the band is going in for their new album. The song manages to maintain the distinct sound that firmly brands their previous music (with billowing guitar riffs and a few howls out of Karen), while showing the band’s own evolution into something more palatable for the mainstream connoisseur, seen in the basic-yet-catchy verses.
The rest of the album is filled out by a variety of songs that lie somewhere between the older and newer Yeah Yeah Yeahs aura. Songs like “Dudley” and “Way Out” show elements of the more matured sound: they are leashed by flowing melodies that are complemented by the simple beauty of Karen O’s gentled tones, with the guitar twirling prettily as it patiently waits for the chorus before erupting to full Yeah Yeah Yeahs standards. Other songs, like “Fancy”, make no effort to reform, featuring the menacing guitars and devious drums that made Fever to Tell so wonderful (not to mention Karen O’s signature shrieking). “Cheated Hearts”, on the other hand, combines the best of both worlds, beginning with the irresistibly charming verses and gradually building up to a rampaging chorus of thrumming guitar, crashing symbols, and a few yips for good measure.
Snuggled in the midst of this is the lively little gem dubbed “Honey Bear”. This track kicks free of the pattern of slow-but-solid paces, immediately bursting out with an upbeat, stomping tempo that shifts sneakily, keeping you on your toes as the guitar scampers happily alongside. Add in Karen’s rhythm-keeping lyrics and this song is sure to get the feet moving.
Whether you are a solid fan of Yeah Yeah Yeahs’ previous music, or prefer their more polished sounds, Show Your Bones has a little something for everyone.
Price: $11.96 *
Joanna McIntyre
REVIEWED : Broadband Noise
WITH : Contraband, Flood of Fire WHERE : The Roxy WHEN : Tuesday, May 2
As I walked up Granville Street and enjoyed the sounds of birds chirping, I couldn’t help but think how strange it was to go to a metal show when it was still broad daylight outside. It’s hard to get into the mood for music that’s all about death and anger when it’s only 8PM on a bright May evening. I felt more like drinking a mojito and sitting on the patio than I did tossing back some shoddy swill and being bombarded by shrill screams and distorted bass. What’s more, I was rather sceptical that any band would be able to turn my mood on its head.
When I stepped into The Roxy, however, Flood of Fire hooked me in with their high-powered brand of hair metal. They played fast and tight and the singer howled at the ceiling as his band mates wailed with the strength of two guitars. The Roxy’s shoddy (but expensive) swill combined with the band’s lyrics about death and Hell successfully reversed my formerly light-hearted temperament. I had just one gripe: only two of the band’s five members had hair long enough to properly head bang.
Next up at bat were Contraband and they brought the hardcore with sufficient quantities of angst, anger and pure rage. It was fast, distorted, hard, and oh, did I mention angry? Thankfully, they directed this anger at such worthy targets as ol’ Gee Dubya. Of all three bands that night they probably offered more to watch than anyone else, seeing as the singer ran around the pit for most of the set and invited people to kick and punch him. Unfortunately, (fortunately?) few in the timid Vancouver crowd took him up on the offer.
Finally, it was time for the show’s headliners. Broadband Noise stepped up and initially, they sounded a lot like that fuzzy distortion you used to get when you fired up your dial-up modem back in the day. But when things coalesced the audience got a dose of an accomplished band pulling influences from genres as diverse as nü metal and prog-rock. I thought I even heard a little Tool in there. One minute you had quick, complex chord changes, the next you had spacey delay-soaked distortion scapes. In any case, it was properly dark and hard. Michelle Yale on the mic obviously has a strong voice, though at times it sounded like she couldn’t quite compete with the band. I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt and blame it on the soundman, since she seems to do a good job on their recorded material.
When the show finished up at an early 10:30, it was just dark enough out for me to put my head down and entertain my accumulated dark thoughts all the way home. Mission
accomplished. *
Peter Clark
V FOR VENDETTA (2006)
The year is 2020. The place, London, England. The evening curfew has left the streets desolate except for a young woman named Evey (Natalie Portman) who is cornered by four plain-clothed policemen who intend to punish her digression by raping her.
Out of the shadows emerges ‘V’ (Hugo Weaving), wearing high black boots, a black wide brimmed hat, a formal black cape and a Guy Fawkes mask that has a permanent smile. He elegantly dispatches the police with martial arts skill and creative weaponry. So begins an uneasy friendship as Evey, over time, slowly comes to trust and care about this character. This particular evening, a rather unusual first date,is highlighted by a symphony of destruction as ‘V’ orchestrates the exploding of London’s Old Bailey.
Guy Fawkes is the rebel who tried and failed to blow up the British parliament buildings in 1605. “V’s ultimate goal is to accomplish what Guy Fawkes failed to achieve and the film follows the execution of his plan over a 12 month period. Within this repressed society, ‘V’ moves with grace, creating mayhem with cool, calculated disruptive events. The political dictator of the tightly controlled population of Britain is Sutter (a convincing John Hurt). He gives orders to his council via a huge television screen. We never see the man in the flesh (except at the very end of the film). I was reminded of the great and mighty Oz in the Wizard of Oz where the man behind the screen has questionable control over events and people in the world.
As displayed in this story, Sutter is very much the personification of Big Brother. An interesting side note to John Hurt is that he played Winston Smith in the film “Nineteen Eighty-Four” (the version released in 1984). The strong supporting cast is lead by Stephen Rea and Rupert Graves who are effective as the police detectives trying to solve the puzzle of ‘V.’
‘V’ does have a vendetta, a score to settle, and he carries it out with precision. I won’t reveal the nature of this vendetta save to say it has to do with the bleak events in his life that have forced him to wear the mask. One of the interesting aspects to the Guy Fawkes mask is that it never moves nor is there a hole or cut-out for the mouth (unlike the Batman mask). At no time during the film does ‘V’ remove his mask, especially with the dramatic flair that Luke Skywalker removes the helmet of Darth Vader just before Vader’s death.
Hugo Weaving must act using his body and his voice. He does this with accomplished skill. You may remember Hugo Weaving as Agent Smith in the Matrix movies. The Wachowski brothers, Andy and Larry, produced both this film and the Matrix trilogy. Once again the producers have created a vision where a character lives in one world (in this case, a hidden underground hideaway) and enters our urban society in carefully planned and executed forays designed to reek havoc with the accepted norm.
I believe the producers were very deliberate in creating a film that points at the present direction of government, especially in the United States and Britain. One of the most important underlying themes of this film is the explicit use of fear to control the population. Alongside this theme is the government’s fear of the loss of control that the truth might precipitate.
For example, to cover up their failure in preventing ‘V’ from blowing up the Old Bailey, the government cheerfully explains that it was actually a planned demolition. Can you spell disinformation?
This bleak futuristic film is based on the graphic novel by Alan Moore and well directed by James McTeigue. It’s not overly laden with special effects but there’s enough to keep the fantasy exciting. As in the Matrix films, there are times when you wish the story could be told more visually, with less use of long sequences of dialogue. It is a well crafted, thought provoking and entertaining film.
Beowulf & Grendel (2005)
You have to give Icelandic born, Canadian director Sturla Gunnarsson credit for trying to make a film in the foreboding landscape of Iceland. The story is based on the epic, unreadable poem ‘Beowulf’ written around the 9th century A.D.
In my mind, this effort only half worked and the things that didn’t took away from the potential of this being a really fine film. The theme is an oft-used narrative about a helpless village summoning help to rid themselves of a deadly threat. ‘The Seven Samurai’ and its contemporary western remake, ‘The Magnificent Seven’ is on example of this storyline. Hrothgar the of Daneland (an effective Stellan Skarsgaard) has watched his population slowly dwindle as a murderous troll named Grendel (Ingvar Sigurdsson) decimates his flock.
Drunken and depressed, Hrothgar summons the legendary slayer Beowulf from Geatland (Southern Sweden). Beowulf (Gerard Butler), takes up the challenge and sets sail for the foreboding Icelandic shores. They find the troll both elusive and nimble as hescampers up rocky outcrops with the agility of a mountain goat. It is only in conversation with the witch Selma (Sarah Polley) that Beowulf begins to understand that perhaps this troll has a legitimate axe to grind with Hrothgar. Perhaps the murderous rage wrought by Grendel is an anger borne of revenge and not he is not a cold-blooded animal to be feared.
Coastal Iceland with its stark and raw beauty, is a breath-taking backdrop to this story. Unfortunately, the writer (Andrew Rai Berzins) has decided to spice up the dialogue with rather contemporary language. For example, Beowulf is washed up on shore and meets a fisherman who has heard tales of the exploits of Beowulf. In recognizing his good fortune in meeting this heroic figure, the fisherman says, ‘Well if my shit doesn’t shine.’
Later, when the King and his men describe some of the methods of the fierce troll, one of Beowulf’s men states,’ this troll must be one tough prick.’ For me, this type of language was so incongruent with the setting and the time period that it broke the spell cast by the film.
Another error in story telling had to do with the opening scenes which tell the story of Grendel and his father and explain the motivation behind Grendel’s attacks on the Danes. For me, the joy in the discovery of key plot points, especially discovery at the same time as the characters, is part of the fun. In this film, you’re left waiting to find out at what point in the story Beowulf will learn the truth you already know. It’s just not as intriguing.
All the characters have accents that are a mix of Scottish/Irish/ Northern European except Sarah Polley’s Selma who sounds like she’s recently walked off the boat from Toronto. Couldn’t she have been directed to use a voicing other than her comparatively flat native Canadian accent? The acting is convincing and Gerard Butler as Beowulf manages to show a little heart beneath his warrior exterior. And now my pet peeve with period films: why do people who live in huts, a few hundred years after the birth of Christ, always have clean faces and occasionally wear make-up? Mussing up a character’s hair hardly represents primitive hygiene and rough living conditions. A little authenticity goes a long way.
Beowulf and Grendel is an interesting film and worth a rental. Just don’t expect too much. With some careful attention to detail, it could have been so much better. *
Allan Stanleigh
American Inventor
WHAT : Best of Auditions part 1 WHERE : ABC WHEN : Thursday 8/7c and 9/8c
American Inventor is the name of the show, (not so inventive) with the spawn of other “American” reality T.V. shows from American Idol to Americas top model, I pretty well guessed the premise of the show.
Basically a bunch of inventors from across America are interviewed with only a couple of minutes to wow the board of judges, including Ed Evangelista, a marketing/advertising genius from New York.
I tuned in before the actual episode to watch the “best of auditions”, outtakes of inventors who didn’t make it into the running. This is basically an hour of really great editing designed to make the inventors look clinically insane and the judges appearing quite intelligent.
The first guy to step up to the plate was a man who’s actual title is rocket scientist. This has to be good I thought to myself. What did he invent you may ask? “Shit and shave”, and yes it pretty much explains itself.
While on the toilet there is a portable shave compartment that attaches to the neck enabling men to perform two very important tasks at once. I don’t know but somehow that takes the sexiness away from shaving.
Other great inventions included a towel with a magnet (which I thought quite cool), disposable cat litter box, throw-away bedding, suits for your car, which is worth elaborating on. Basically you dress your car in clothes when you go out, dependent on the occasion, just like you dress yourself. Sounds practical on paper right?
There was even a flatulence deodorizer that you wear like a pad on the inside of your underwear. The funniest part was not the product but the story the inventor told on national television about his wife being the reason he invented the product. Someone will be sleeping on the couch tonight, maybe it’s best though with his wife’s problem and all.
The judges are the typical “American Idol” type judges except for the there is not ONE nice judge on this show, everyone is the devil’s advocate on American Inventor. One typically English judge, the bastard, took a 76-year-old woman’s invention and threw it across the room, almost making her cry but impressively enough she retorted back, and the judge ended up picking it up for her. That will teach you to disobey your grandmother.
The final invention was one that finally got a reaction out of the judges and my roommate, watching with me.
“Knotty knot lingerie”, (a great name) was presented by a well dressed and good looking woman, along with her accomplice, a young and fresh faced blonde sporting a long trench coat. The judges finally asked to reveal the invention, and off came the coat to reveal it in all its splendor. A red bow tied around a woman’s breasts. But wait there’s more. What do we do with a bow that’s neatly tied? Well it was pulled by one of the male judges of course and out came the censors. The only woman judge on the board pulled a “Maury Povich” and ran off the stage, threatening to quit. What a prude.
Anyway, these are just the out takes so I would recommend sticking in for the actual show. *
Charity West
SINNER & SAINT DISCUSS REALITY TV ...In the 1950s, home audiences watched as newlyweds competed on television for prizes like refrigerators and living room sets. The couples were asked questions about their spouses’ bathroom habits and favorite meals. A bride may have blushed when confronted with the knowledge that tuna casserole was her husband’s least favorite dinner choice. The term “making whoopee” was still used and even the men seemed uncomfortable about discussing their wives’ personal details.
In stark contrast, the current fad of reality television is starting down a long winding road of scandal and sensationalism. In short, it is getting ridiculous.
Fast forward to 2006, where we use newlyweds as lab rats and put a dozen strangers in one house hoping that , given enough time and provocation, they’ll hook up to give the network their ratings. We love the dating shows, with the hot tub scenes, the drunken girls who vomit on their blind date and the celebrities who don’t have the first clue about how to do their own laundry. As a culture, we can’t seem to get enough of the sociological experiments that are “Survivor”, “Big Brother”, and even “The Bachelor”. Instead of watching a couple of cute love birds, our generation prefers to vote for who the Barbie wannabe should marry while watching “Who wants to marry a millionaire?”
That being said, I must confess to having once been addicted to the first season of Survivor. I used it as an excuse to watch something (anything) with a then-crush and unforeseeably got hooked. It actually got to the point that even when it was obvious that the man in question was not a good idea, I still kept going over because I didn’t have cable but couldn’t bear to miss an episode. I couldn’t tell you who won the million dollar prize that year, and I honestly must tell you that it is impossible for me to put my finger on any significant life changes that occurred (for me) as a result of a whole season wasted sitting on that loser’s couch. Which brings me to my point: there is not much to be gained by watching a variety of shows that are supposedly based on reality while you ignore your own personal version of life.
This sentiment, of course, is based on the more popular and reoccurring shows… The Bachelor (season 74) and Survivor (season 114) and Big Brother (I lost count on this one)… the shows that just refuse to die. Different faces, different islands, different “challenges” that all bring the audience to the same place – bedtime. But the networks and producers have certainly been successful in creating a nation of obsessed fans. For teens, these shows are a requirement for social survival. They must be watched to ensure that one is not out of the loop the next day at school. For adults…. Well, it’s just about the same premise - minus the lockers and with the addition of a water cooler. It gives colleagues a common ground, without discrimination towards those with children or without, married or single, and hobbies aside.
However, with original ideas for these shows becoming increasingly rare and any moral ideas now long extinct, it begs the question “where is our limit?” We will watch women who have bought into the idea that they are meeting and will potentially be marrying an elusive and wealthy bachelor as they are tricked into dating a poor construction worker (Joe Millionaire). We have fallen for the twist on the Blind Date phenomenon with Elimidate, where a team of women or men try their best to beat out their competition and dates are blatantly rejected for not being drunk, naked, or slutty enough. We make bets against whether or not a beautiful woman will dump her newly introduced TV-fiancé or take the $25,000 she has been offered to introduce him to her family and convince them of their intention to marry (My Big Fat Obnoxious Fiancé). And somehow, the whole while, we remain far enough removed to enjoy their discomfort yet close enough to enjoy the feeling of superiority that we would never be caught doing something like THAT.
So what is it all about? Perhaps it isn’t the fantasy, the getaway, the distraction that these shows offer. Maybe the whole idea is to grant the opportunity for even the most average among us to feel grateful for the lack of drama in his life. While we have always been envious of celebrity, we can now sit back - pleasantly unseen. There are no cameras in our bathrooms, no crews following us around as we go about our daily routines. My nerves are bad enough when faced with a routine challenge at work; I certainly don’t need a bunch of cheerleaders yelling for me to eat a bottle of live roaches. I can come and go as I please, eat what I want and sleep in my own bed without fear of being awakened by hyenas in the jungle.
Yes, finally, I believe this is the appeal. To add adventure where required and gratitude where it is missing. And if this is indeed the true purpose that Reality TV serves, I understand and respect its divine intervention in this society. *
Jody Winder is a Freelance Writer who has never had the guts to try out for Canadian Idol, enjoys watching Girls Behaving Badly and cried herself to sleep when The Jamie Kennedy Experiment was taken off the air.
Jody Winder
I wrote the best article EVER on Reality TV. I mean, this was a doozy! I made some stellar points about why people watch it – the psychosis of it all – and why people deny they watch it – the neurosis of it all.
My dog ate it. And, never being one to back up anything on my hard drive, I had to start over again. I realized then, at that exact moment, that only entity to blame for the meteoric rise of Reality TV is the Situational Comedy (not my dog). While variety shows presented an early challenge, sitcoms have had a stranglehold on North American audiences since television was first introduced. Shows like the incomparable I Love Lucy and The Adventures of
Ozzie and Harriet had audiences chuckling at a speeding conveyor belt of chocolates and engrossed in little Ricky Nelson’s love life. And they were truly great. And they still, to this very day, hold up well.
So what went wrong? Did they run out of stories? Did they run out of jokes?
I think that the real problem is they quit pushing the boundaries. There was a time when sitcoms were the most controversial and experimental form in the medium of television, and many things that are now considered passé are only passé because we’ve seen them on TV so very often. Billy Crystal became the first openly gay recurring TV character in a 1970’s episode of Soap. Archie Bunker was the first character to let, ‘God damn it!’ slip out of his mouth on television. Uh, the entire run of Married…With Children!?! These were the types of things that made sitcoms substantial and worthwhile.
They no longer are.
The last truly great, cutting-edge sitcom was Seinfeld. Sure, Friends was alright for awhile (the last three seasons were a disgrace, and they should have renamed the show ‘Couples’) and Will & Grace started with some promise (I’m gay, and I don’t even watch it anymore!), but everything lately has been simply awful. And the comedy shows that are watchable now – The Office, My Name Is Earl, Arrested Development (R.I.P.) – are certainly far from the conventional sitcom format.
Then, COPS and The Real World came along, and then shows like Big Brother, Survivor, and The Apprentice truly took the world by storm. And afterall, deep down inside some of these shows there really is some true good. I mean, I now know what to do if I am ever trapped with nine roommates, on a desert island, all struggling through the most important interview process of our lifetime (I drink heavily, get fire, and be a bold decision-maker).
So we turn to Reality TV. We watch people, similar to us but stupider and more neurotic, do crazy things, generally for money, and we watch, and watch, and watch. We can’t be blamed. We were suckled on TV; we were nurtured directly from its cathode-ray tubes. So now, with the passing of the sitcom, what are we left to suck on? Only the breast of Reality TV. *
Joel is currently struggling through the greatest disappointment of his lifetime: The baby of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes was, unfortunately, not half black.Joel Gook
Essential books to add to your suitcase…
A friend of mine once described the mind as a suitcase and every thought or memory you compile throughout your life as its contents. Each item in your suitcase can be brought out and put away as needed. Some things can be hidden and forgotten about for years and some things you need everyday. Every book that affects you in any way adds something to your suitcase. These are some of the books that have added significant weight to mine.
For introspective days…
Robertson Davies The Deptford TrilogyWhy is it that Canadian writers are always picked last if they are even picked at all? Robertson Davies’ The Deptford Trilogy is a must read and an essential on my booklist. Start with Fifth Business and you won’t be able to resist The Manticore or World of Wonders. Davies captures what it is to be an introspective human in Dunstan Ramsay. These books make a three-part guide to extreme soul searching.
For greedy days…
John Steinbeck The PearlWhatever your pearl may be it is easy to let it blind you from what is truly important. We all need a reminder every now and then to stay grounded and listen to feminine intuition. Steinbeck uses emotion on top of emotion in this book to create a parfait of mistrust and anguish. This book is essential to me because it doesn’t end well. A canon of sunshine and lollipops is unrealistic and boring.
For socially frustrating days…
Barbara Kingsolver The Poisonwood Bible This book is a crucial reminder that other people have feelings too. Kingsolver gives the reader a refreshing choice of which character to sympathize with. Other than the antagonizing father figure, every character in the story has equal first person face time. Every reader experiences this book differently. The Poisonwood Bible is in my suitcase for days when I truly can’t see anyone else’s point of view.
For every day…
T.S. Eliot The Collected Work of T.S. Eliot
I have an old battered copy of The Collected works of T.S. Eliot that literally travels everywhere with me. Throughout my ever-changing phases of reading, T.S Eliot has always left me in awe. I am not suggesting that everyone in this world needs to contemplate tattooing “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock” somewhere on there body, but I am suggesting that you remember the books that affect you the most. Sometimes rereading and rereading a favorite is better than trying something new. This book is my warm sweater. *
C.S.
The Town That Forgot How to Breathe
By Kenneth J. Harvey
With no more fish to catch the once lively Newfoundland village, Bareneed, finds itself beset with all kinds of peculiar problems. Mysterious disappearances, ghostly little girls, and a bizarre respitory disease are just the beginning. Soon the ocean starts to spit out wild creatures, things of rumor and myth. Odder still, the bodies that begin to float to the surface, amazingly well preserved even when they seem to be hundreds of years old. Joseph Blackwood and his young daughter soon discover that they have picked the wrong place for their family vacation.
This book is chock full of eccentric and appealing characters. There’s Eileen Laracy, with her homespun dialect and love for the unusual little town. Joseph Blackwood, and his gifted and haunted daughter Robin, who are both tossed into the inexplicable events through no fault of their own. Tommy Quilty, passed off as simply retarded by the townsfolk, but who has an amazing gift of foresight. Even the army commander who is called in to help the
shattered village, has the unusual ability to be hard nosed and practical, even while keeping an open mind to any possibility. Don't expect to forget any of these remarkable people any time soon.
The Town that Forget How to Breathe is a highly literary work that defies genre classification. This novel is as thought provoking as it is creepy. Part of its great appeal is in how you can never guess what the next page might reveal, where the next turn will take you. Harvey makes you believe, for better or worse, anything is possible. The beautiful, poetic language is haunting and unforgettable; even if sometimes Harvey seems less concerned with getting the most suitable word then he is with picking the most uncommon one. This is a memorable debut for the Canadian author.* *
Renee Mallett
Division Day may be from Los Angeles, but they are not anything like any bands you’ve heard before and take influence from artists you have more than likely have in your record collection.
After 5 years of playing together, the rock quartet has put out a full-length record called Beartrap Island. It has 12 eerie songs discussing tigers, hurricanes and death. It is an intense record that will hook listeners with the sharp guitars of Ryan Wilson on tracks like Tap-Tap, Click-Click. Wilson is much more prevalent on this album than past efforts. Now the songs seem to have heavier guitar riffs, which really rock. Wilson says that Sonic Youth and John Cale (Velvet Underground), have been influencing his guitar playing as of late.
Accompanying Wilson are the vocals and keyboards of Rohner Segnitz. The music would not be complete without his words, or rather, it would take on a whole different meaning. His lyrics are dark in most parts and are reminiscent of the meanness of Bruce Springsteen and Sylvia Plath but have a whole original voice on their own, as in the title track. “After 13 months on Beartrap Island now/I learned the words to bring you down.”
Backing both Wilson and Segnitz are Seb Bailey, bass and auxiliary guitars, and the vibrant drumming of Kevin Lenhart. The bass and drum combo created on the album is unstoppable. It gives the music a pace and rhythm, which have to power to be both a whirling heaviness and softness at different points on the album. *
In 2000, the band, which took their name from an Elliott Smith record, rented a house and recorded a 4-track E.P. The homemade album consisted of piano, guitar, bass, drums and a projector for the click-sound on Acre. Even at early stages, listeners can tell that this band had the promise of originality. Their second effort, The Mean Way In, was a six-song record with the same emotion of the first record, but with more intensity. Segnitz sang about dreams and malice ; a reoccurring theme in his vocals. During a past interview, Segnitz said The Mean Way In was “written and recorded during a period of intense struggle. For me, that context colors its contents more than any other one factor. It’s about the transition into adulthood.” Segnitz graduated from Stanford University with a degree in the arts. His weird, unique style is in all three albums and their covers and their T-shirts were hand-drawn by both Segnitz and Wilson. Division Day has a humorous edge to them, which is seen between songs at their shows. They make jokes, tell stories and laugh. Overall, Division Day is a good listen for anyone down for a new sound. *
Nick Coury
Cheshire Cheese Inn123 Carrie Cates Crt, N. Van 604-987-3322
I went with a friend of mine who let me have my pick of many restaurants in the area we were in, although this was his first suggestion. I m not much for English food – I mean I ve only heard not the best things. But I took a gander at the menu and thought, ‘ as long as it s not too meaty.’ I ended up getting a hot chicken salad and my friend had fish and chips. Aren’t we boring? The good news is we drank beer and wine and the service was good ( even though I didn t ASK for that baguette. Actually I frankly said ‘ no thanx’ and she brought it anyway. And true I did eat half of it but that s your fault, missy.) because our food was so bland no matter where you order it, it was hard to judge the quality but this is definitely more of a pub type place anyway. Lots of regulars, older English people who want to watch the game on one of the many TVs. It s cozy though and I had quite a nice time. Weird name though hey? What's with that...
Food : ***
Service : *** ½
Atmosphere : ****
Overall : C +
HOW TO AVOID BEING ON OUR " DON'T WEAR THIS" LIST...
It’s everywhere you look. Admit it. You see the girl walking in front of you wearing hip huggers that are just a size – or three – smaller than they should be. You want to grab her and shake her, screaming “Muffin top is not cool, lady!” Until you look down and have an epiphany – your hip huggers are looking a tad snug, too.
Here at Kira’s Eye, we want to save you from this terrible fate. So, read on and learn how to be the one getting the admiring glances rather than the awkward stares……..
THE WHALE TAILSpeaking of too tight hiphuggers….That’s right, we have all seen it in the streets and been very afraid. And, since we’re all friends here, let’s just admit that we have all done our share of the scaring from time to time. The whale tail is every girl’s worst nightmare, unless you are a stripper and can somehow make this look hot. Hell, even celebrities do it! (See Uma Thurman,top left , getting her whale tail on.) But, ladies, this does not make it either attractive or right! Do us all a favor and get some lower undies or some higher pants. Go commando if you have to!
THE WIDE BELTYou saw it on our Spring Trends list, so it’s got to be true. We tried and tried to keep this wide belt thing back in the ‘80’s where it belongs, but alas it has broken free and is now running rampant on catwalks across the world. So, if you’re ready to get back to your retro roots, then be sure to pair this look with a long piece, like a trench coat or hip length sweater. Nothing shorter than the belt itself, obviously. Also, pick the pieces that you will be wearing along with the belt in neutral or one-tone colors. The belt should be unique and fabulous, and should not have to compete with any crazy patterns or prints. That said, this whole wide belt thing looks great on really slim people. But if you don’t want the attention to be on your waist, then skip ahead and leave this one alone, friends. You want to look chiq and fab, not certifiably insane.
GOTTA HAVE THOSE GAUCHOSOK, so you are one of those rare people that can actually make these things look great. We are all very proud. But wait – take a second look in the mirror, darlin’, and be sure before you step out into the real world. Gauchos are adorable – with some very notable exceptions. Let’s stick to the obvious – if, for some unknown and ungodly
reason, you actually own slouchy boots, NEVER wear them with gauchos!!! Honestly, people!!! The gaucho is meant to be work with either cute ballet flats, sexy stilettos or knee length heeled boots. Anything with flair and height will enhance the look. Anything, however, that shows a gap of skin between your boot and the pant hem will just make you look plain silly. Secondly, if you are of shorter stature and you are in love with the gaucho trend, I have some terribly bad news for you. It’s unfair, to be true, but these things were just not made for those of us that need heels just to get onto the rides at the fair. If you slip on a pair of these things and they fall lower than just past your knee, please tear them off and promise to never speak of them again. You will honestly just look like you accidentally shrunk your regular pants, and it will result in mockery and me telling you that I told you so.
SUNGLASSES – IS BIGGER REALLY BETTER?Yes, Victoria Beckham and Paris Hilton look completely cute in their over-the-top, face covering sunglasses. But people, you are not running from the paparazzi or trying on a Miami Vice-esque disguise. Please think about it before, a la Nicole here, grabbing a pair of these enormous wrap around shades! You may look trendy, but there are so many varieties of shades that there is bound to be one or two more flattering styles. I am not saying to steer clear of this sexy and stylish trend. When you have a fun and flirty mood hit you, dig out your pink colored aviators and have fun! But for everyday use, please spare us the celeb impersonations and find a pair that is more suited to your face type.
GOLD GONE WRONG
Gold is all that glitters this season, but make sure that your bling is blended, not blinding. The best way to turn this season’s hottest color into a wearable fashion statement is to give it a background to play off of. Pair a slinky gold-toned halter with a long, black skirt for dramatic flair. Or drape yourself in multi-stranded gold chains and pair with some delicate glitter-trimmed flats for a glitzy feel. But for the love of Chanel, please forgo the head to toe gilded look. You are not living in the ‘70’s, and you did not get your outfit by melting down your grandma’s old jewellery. Hopefully, you are not this poor guy on the top left. Remember, drama not deadly glare.
FOOTLESS TIGHTSNo, I am not joking. People have honestly dug these out of their closets and are staging a revival. Hey, not judging or anything. But the second you start pairing these with the hip-length t-shirt, I really have to wonder what year you think this is. So, if you must go there, please save us all from the animal prints! You could possibly redeem yourself by wearing these underneath a cute jean skirt or something. But if I see any of you sporting the “footless tights under Daisy Duke shorts” look, I will honestly have to kick your ass.
BIG, BAD BOOB BLUNDERS
Ladies, whether you’re a AA or a DD, you need to read this! Spring has sprung, and along with it all of those lovely little halters and tank tops. But how much thought are you giving to what’s underneath? Because one little slip up in that area, and your outfit has suddenly been ruined by a case of ‘Bad Rack’. Sorry to be forced to use this male-created catch phrase, but the fact that I am being so crude must give you an idea of the importance of taking care of your girls! Your girls like to be harnessed in when wearing a fitted top. Most especially a white one. Whether you are especially busty or beautifully small, this goes out to you. Maintain and enhance during this most skimpy season, and you will get more moves and less laughs. Your girls also like to be fitted properly with the correct size bra. Back fat is not something that either of you will enjoy, trust me. For the sake of comfort, if not for beauty, go see a specialized bra fitter and she will change your life!
THESE (COWBOY) BOOTS WERE MADE FOR WALKING...and if you step out of the house pairing them with mid-length cotton shorts, you had better just have those boots turn you back around into your house! See the photo top right, from the NY Times, for further proof of that. I have not used the word ‘dorky’ since high school, but I am oh so tempted now! Cowboy boots are a special trend, and really a love or hate kind of item. With a cute denim skirt or some Daisy Duke kind of shorts (if you’ve got the thighs for ‘em!), they look pretty hot. Pair your westerns with some worn in jeans or a long peasant skirt, and you’re still doing fine. Anything else, and you are walking a very fine tightrope line of possible shame, humiliation and seeing your photo in our next ‘How NOT to wear it’ article.
NOW TO TOP IT ALL OFF WITH SOME HINTS FOR THE COSMETICALLY CHALLENGED………….Don’t fret, you’re not the only one who has gone a bit crazy with the fake tanner a time or two. But this season is all about natural, with a light but inspired dip into some of the brighter hues.
DON’T lay it on thick; heavily line your eyes in black line a zombie queen; combine several bright shades of eye shadow, like turquoise and purple; paint your fingernails black anymore.
DO use a natural colored base with a light dusting of bronzer to get a healthy look; use soft pink as a theme with a dash of blue liner for kicks; go for anything named cotton candy or bubble gum as the hottest trend right now.
And finally, DO wear whatever makes you happiest and most comfortable. Because, no matter the trend, the thing that will make you look your best and most beautiful is confidence and heart. Here’s wishing you a Spring full of casual glances and pockets stuffed with your phone number! *
Bonnie Lynn
Title: Tomb Raider LegendPlaystation 2, Xbox, Xbox 360, PC/April 2006
Price: $49.95 - $59.95 (Xbox 360)
# of Players: 1
Graphics: 3/5
Sound: 3/5
Control: 2.5/5
Overall: 3/5
Back in 1996, the first Tomb Raider game was released on the original Playstation and the world, along with legions of horny, salivating fanboys, was introduced to Lara Croft and the largest rack the industry had ever seen. The game was more or less Indiana Jones with breasts instead of a fedora, but it was something the industry hadn’t seen before, and one of the first dominant three-dimensional platformers. It was a blast for it’s time, and it stuck out for a number of quality reasons, but a number of years and about six or seven half-assed sequels later and the franchise was a tired shadow of it’s former self. Times changes, the games started to really suck, and the franchise was canned altogether.
Then a year or so ago, the creators of the franchise lost the property and it was given to another developer, Crystal Dynamics, in a last-ditch attempt to breathe some life into the series. And now we have the fruits of their labor, Tomb Raider: Legend. This game more or less scraps the storylines from the previous games and starts fresh, sending the titular character on a global expedition that begins with the how, why, and what killed her mother after their plane crashed when Lara was a child.
Everything about this Tomb Raider feels at once fresh and yet still somewhat dated. The graphics are a definite improvement over the previous iterations of the series, but still don’t hold up today when so many other titles are pushing the envelope as much as possible. It’s difficult to appreciate character designs like these after you’ve played something like Metal Gear Solid 3. And while the Xbox 360 version is without a doubt the prettiest of the bunch, it’s only improvements are skin-deep (nicer textures, etc.)The sound is also much improved, but the music leaves much to be desired. When spelunking through ancient tombs and solving mythic puzzles, a techno beat kind of drags you out of the experience. The voice work is competent enough, but the constant sound bites that come over the com system are annoying as all hell, especially after you’ve plummeted to you’re death for the thirtieth time.
Which brings me to my next issue: the controls. They are a huge leap over the old Tomb Raider grid-based controls, but they still feel as if quality control was rushed, especially in the case of sequences that require timed button presses - you get no warning, and every now and then they do nothing to make it clear as to what you actually need to be doing.All of this, coupled with a very half-assed story brings about quite a bit of disappointment. This is a huge improvement over every Tomb Raider that came after number 2, but it still feels as if it comes about six or seven years too late. For fans of the series, they’ll probably love the new direction, but for all others looking for just a new game, this is only a rental - unfortunately. I think it’s time we put this series to pasture.
Title: Burnout RevengePlaystation 2, Xbox, Xbox 360/September 2005 (March 2006 - Xbox 360)
Price: $49.95
# of Players: 1-2 (+ online)
Graphics: 5/5
Sound: 5/5
Control: 5/5
Overall: 5/5
Burnout Revenge is the game that every single kid playing Rad Racer on the NES in the late 80's had hoped racing games would one day become. It’s fast, furious, fun, and damn near impossible to put down.The fourth title in the Burnout series, Revenge graced the Playstation 2 and Xbox systems in the fall, but was just recently released on the Xbox 360. The Burnout series separates itself from all other racing games on the market by focusing on the most overlooked aspect there is - the crashes. The point of this game is not just to get to the finish line, but to get there in style and take as many of your opponents with you as possible. You will crash. A lot. And it is a bloody blast every single time.
The single player game presents itself as a series of ten platforms, each one consisting of a number of events that must be completed to achieve a higher ranking. There are a series of different events. Race, either short, long, forward or backward, is just what it says - get to the finish line first. Elements are added in as you progress, such as the ability to use Crashbreakers (basically blowing yourself up after you crash to take your opponents with you). There is Road Rage, where you race through streets taking out a set number of opponents in a given time limit. Crash mode, like a game of golf, where an elaborate scene is presented to you, and you find the best way to cause as much damage as possible while raking up cash. And Burning Lap, where you get to the finish as fast as humanly possible.
Another staple of the series is the Aftertouch. While insanely unrealistic, it allows you to essentially steer your wreck after you’ve crashed, so that you can attempt to wipe out those that eliminated you as well. But then, if you’re playing this game for realism, you’re going to be severely disappointed. This game is arcade fun all the way. The graphics across all systems are positively stunning, and when the sparks fly after an accident, you’ll learn to appreciate it all the more. Everything is as slick as it possibly can be.
The sound is equally fantastic. Every crash, every scrape of metal, is as wrenching as it should be. Auditory orgasm, every time. The music on the other hand, is the typical EA selection of teeny pop and overtly angsty alt-punk. Some will love it, others, like me, will be hooking up their iPod to their stereo to drown out the pain of it all.With the new Xbox 360 version, there is not a huge amount of differences. The graphics are a little gussied up and it will look just that much prettier on a tv with an HD output. Also, the Xbox Live aspects on the 360 make the online component just that much more desirable.
In short, the game is a blast, no matter which platform you’re playing it on. If you’ve got one of the earlier versions, there’s no reason to upgrade to the 360 version, but if not, then dive right the hell in.
Title: Shadow of the ColossusPlaystation 2/September 2005
Price: $39.95
# of Players: 1
Graphics: 5/5
Sound: 5/5
Control: 3/5
Overall: 5/5
Roger Ebert can blow me.
A week or so ago, in Boulder, Colorado, Ebert took part in a panel discussing whether or not video games can be considered art. Despite the fact that cinema was considered an abomination against art when it was first introduced to the world, he still vehemently opposes the mere concept of calling a game a work of art. After playing Shadow of the Colossus, I’ve come to the loving conclusion that Roger Ebert can suckle my sweet, salty balls.Although this game came out last September, far too many people have neglected it for far too long and I hope to rectify that.
The game begins with the simplest of storylines. A young man carries a comatose woman on horseback across a massive, very slim stone bridge to a towering structure sitting in the center of an enclosed valley. Once inside, the woman is placed on an alter and a booming voice tells the young man that to restore her to life, sixteen colussi must be found and destroyed. All you have is a loyal horse, a bow and arrow, and a mystical sword that when held up to the light, can point the way to your next target.The game is a puzzle game, first and foremost. While you are given a gorgeous, living world to travel through at your leisure, once you find your targets, the objective becomes not only killing them, but finding out how to kill them, by scaling them, exposing weak spots, and tricking them into making themselves vulnerable.
What makes this game so unique is the sensation you feel playing it. It brings about excitement and melancholy in one breath. Each colossus is a living, beautiful creature, and the only reason they try to harm you at all, is because you are hunting them. Made up of stone, fur and flesh, they tower over each scene like something I never thought would be possible in video games. Even a small colossus is still dozens of times your size. The game attempts things that you always wanted to do, but never thought would be possible, like riding your horse as fast as humanly possible next to the wing of a colossus as it skins the desert floor, only to leap off the horse and onto the wing at the last second before it launches back into the air, carrying you hundreds of feet up. Or the final foe, a fight that feels like how one would imagine WWI trench warfare would have felt, and that’s before you get to the base and are forced to scale the beast.
The graphics are something unique and beautiful as well. While the models are simple, the texture and lighting create a feeling of euphoria that most games can’t hope to achieve.
The music is beautifully composed, apprehensive when searching for a fight, exciting when scaling to the top, and melancholy upon each and every death.The control is not perfect in any way, and at times the character feels a little light in terms of gravity, but it gets the job done.If I haven’t made it clear by now, go out and buy this game. Now. It stands as one of the most unique experiences of this generation, if not any. It’s riveting, exciting, morose, and
art.Suck it, Ebert. *
Andrew Wilmot
OVEN BAKED COOKIE
JEWEL KILCHER
When Jewel first came on the scene in the mid 90’s , I hated her. I thought she was annoying and overplayed and she did nothing for me. But one day at a friend’s house, her cd was played and I actually liked it. It was a horrible discovery. There was a time when I liked her an unhealthy amount but when she did the whole “ my hands are small, I know” thing and the rest of the world was Jewel savy, I let it go. Now she s letting razor commercials use her songs and hittin it up with Beyonce, I m not really all that interested. But there was a time when this little guitar playing, horse petting, semi-Swedish speaking cutie had my heart! Plus, just look at her, come on. Catch her in the upcoming film Wave. *