KE ZINE

ISS 22 (2007) MAY 13 - JULY 1

WHO: The Sam Davidson Quartet  
WHERE: La Casa Del Artista  
WHEN: May 10th, 2007

Jazz is more complex than rock music, straight up.  On the continuum of difficulty, it is rivaled only by classical music in  its requirements of technical mastery.  It is no surprise, then, that to the average lover of rock who revels in a good 3  chord hook, a catchy chorus line, or predictable repetition, jazz might come off as the anti-Christ of listen-ability.  By  comparison, much of the jazz catalogue is a virtually inaccessible jungle of ear activity and requires diligence and some  appreciation for sophistication in sound to be navigated successfully and enjoyably.

Tack on to this the fact that much of jazz is without the almighty reference point of lyrics and comes stock with its fair  share of hipster fuck wads, players and fans alike, and the result can be a disastrous and off-putting experience for the  first time listener.  So how does one ‘get into’ jazz?  One way might be to check out a group of young Vancouver-based  upstarts called the Sam Davidson Quartet.

The jazz world saw the birth of this new, and hopefully enduring, quartet last Thursday evening.  Carrying heavy doses of
the UBC ‘A’ Band under the tutelage of Fred Stride in their collective schooling, and playing a small room in an East Vancouver building, the group, fronted by  Sam Davidson on clarinet and backed by Parker on keyboards, Brendan on drums, and Ryland on electric bass, unveiled ten original songs to 35 very  appreciative and enthusiastic listeners.  Yes, original material; apparently in jazz this is no small feat and Sam was understandably proud of the fact.

All songs tended to have an identifiable core idea, similar to the main riff in a rock song, from which all soloing took off and returned.  Perhaps an experienced ear would have even noticed such subtleties as whether or not the instrument of focus was shifting song to song according to whether Sam,  Brendan, or Parker had penned the piece.  Regardless, all songs were approached with a competence that was inspiring.  The live sound quality was  generally good to start, but really came to the fore during the third cut, “Unresolved Mysteries” as the volume of Brendan’s drumming eased up slightly,  producing a more even sound between instruments on stage.

Show stealing moments were in abundance, with three of note.  Following Sam’s heartfelt dedication of the fourth number to his friend, Will, he began with a  minute-long clarinet solo of wrenching beauty.  It wasn’t clear whether any one took a breath the whole time, it was that good.  A pin drop could be heard.   The second show stealer belonged to Ryland for his bass soloing during the first song of the second set, “Two Ways Out”.  The element of surprise was  involved as Ryland had been relatively unassuming with his playing up to that point.  He let loose though, playing a dizzying array of string and note patterns  resulting in raucous applause from the audience.  The third moment worthy of mention goes to Brendan for his superior roles and break downs on drums  during “Cambie Bridge”.  Working off of Parker’s held notes on the keyboard, Brendan built a precise storm of climbing and crashing fury, carefully setting up  pauses throughout that drew anticipation from the listener without being predictable.  Again, the audience, as they were all set, was hugely appreciative of  Brendan’s skill.

The show ended with audience calls for an encore followed by politely embarrassed looks and paper shuffling on the band’s part as Sam confided that they  played everything they had.  As with all true performers, however, something can always be pulled out in the moment, and the quartet did so, closing the  show with “Anthem” as the tenth song.  Decidedly more somber in its tone, it was a fitting end to the Sam Davidson Quartet’s first public performance,  reminding all that great live music is as fleeting as the moment in which it exists.*

Matt O.



The perfect suit for YOUR body!

 Summer is right around the corner but before you start unrolling your beach towel, slip into a swimsuit that will flatter all of your assets.  Swim wear has  become a huge part of the fashion industry, making suits available for women of all shapes and sizes, but with that said; please refrain from running out and  purchasing a thong-bikini.  It may look good on the size zero runway model from Brazil, but for the rest of us it would be better to stick to the suggestions below  and avoid the discomforts that come with a thong-bikini.


For those beach dwellers with a  small bust, try a halter neck bathing suit.  This helps to create cleavage  for those that normally have none (or  not a whole lot).  However, if it’s a  bikini that you favour, choose one in a  bright colour, with patterns or ruffles.   This draws the eye upwards and helps flatter you in all the right ways.  Also, look into a bathing suit with built in under wire; this will help give you an extra lift.  And don’t overlook the
appeal of a sexy one piece suit,  always flattering and always in style.

If your body is pear shaped look for a  bathing suit that will help draw the eye  upwards; detail on your bikini top, or  even a top in a brighter colour/shade  will help do that.  If you are looking to  celebrate your curves, slip into a bikini  what ties together just where your  hips start to curve out.  And make sure  you don’t have fabric that bunches  together on your bottom; it is not an  attractive look.

For those of you blessed with a large  bust, try to tone down the ample  cleavage and stay away from string  bikinis.  There is nothing sexy about  popping out of the side of your suit as  you walk down the beach.  Try a  halter neck bikini, it won’t make you  feel hidden but it will help keep things  in their proper place.  But if you are  fighting to hold onto a triangle bikini  top, look for one with built in bust  support.  It will accentuate your  curves but prevent them from slipping  out the side. 

For those of you that are plus size, look for bathing suits that are  solid in colour, or have minimal detail on them.  Darker colours are  always figure flattering but if you really must have a patterned suit,  find one that has swirls or design all over.  Also look for suits with  built-in contouring to help give your body the sexy curves you want  for that sunny day at the beach.

If your body type is more of a boyish/athletic frame, meaning your  shoulders, hips, and waist all have about the same width, try and  find a suit to help accentuate your waist.  A great choice would be  something with a belt around the waist, or even ruffles or ties.   Two piece bathing suits are a great look for this body type, keep it  fun and play up bright colours and bold patterns.  Bandeau tops  and triangle tops would be good choices for those with this body.   And once again, don’t be put off by a one piece suit, as it can  create the illusion of curves and keeps you looking good both in- and-out of the water.*

Jennifer PattersonPhotos: www.victoriassecret.com

In this edition of Kira’s Eye, we look at two recently released films that have a couple of things in common; excellent acting and one-word titles. In ‘Hoax’, a guy  tries to ‘get away with murder’ by pretending to be the author of an authorized biography of Howard Hughes. In ‘Fracture’ a guy tries to get away with murder by,  well,  shooting his wife.

 

THE HOAX (2007) –Okay. I lied. This film title has two words in the title. If Clifford Irving can lie about being the authorized author of  Howard Hughes biography, I can lie about the film having a one-word title in order to create my clever introduction to  this week’s column. As P.T. Barnum related, ‘you can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people  some of the time, but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time.’ In 1971, Clifford Irving certainly fooled a lot of  people. Disappointed by the rejection of his latest novel, Irving (Richard Gere) announced that Howard Hughes had  chosen him to write the authorized biography.

‘The Hoax’ is the story of how one man, obsessed with achieving success in the literary world and the fame and  fortune that comes with that success, decided to pull off an elaborate hoax in order to succeed. It mattered not
whether he stole, lied or deceived to attain his goal. Every time it seemed that the curtain would be pulled to reveal the  lies behind his compelling stories, Irving managed to deftly sidestep the questions. He never gave up on his ultimate  goal. At times, especially with the urging of his partner in this adventure, David Susskind (a very effective Alfred  Molina) it seemed that Irving might give up the project and come clean. Susskind did not possess the steely nerves of  Irving though he did provide a small semblance of moral scruples.



Richard Gere was truly inspired in this role as the footloose author and the supporting cast was also superb. Stanley  Tucci gives a winning, nuanced performance as the greedy yet suspicious publisher. Hope Davis coolly plays Irving's  chilly McGraw Hill editor. Clifford Irving’s life also included his on-again, off-again affair with a rich, married socialite,  Nina van Pallandt (Julie Delpy). Lying about this affair to his tough, long suffering wife Edith (Marcia Gay Harden) was  completely in character with Irving’s deceptive lifestyle.

The story introduces a political subtext that goes something like this: Howard Hughes knew about the false biography  and planted  lies concerning Richard Nixon to be included in the book. Hughes’ motive was to facilitate legislation
favouring his airline, TWA.  This was a needless, confusing subplot that seemed to have as much basis in reality as the ‘lone gunman’ theory of JFK’s
assassination. ‘The Hoax’ is based on the book that Clifford Irving wrote about this elaborate scheme and his subsequent stay in jail. With the success of his book and this film, Clifford Irving gets the last laugh. But was it worth the cost to his reputation and his life? This is an engaging film that holds your interest,  mostly because it really did happened.


Running Time: 115 minutes
Three and a half Stars
‘The Hoax’ is Now in Theatres and Available on DVD in August, 2007
  

FRACTURE (2007) –Fracture is a rare film:  compelling and intelligent. It’s a film that doesn’t resort to visual tricks or action to drive the  narrative or entertain the audience. Its success lies in an excellent script and outstanding acting. Ted Crawford  (Anthony Hopkins) is the owner of a giant aeronautics company. He drives in style, lives in a posh, expansive home  and has a beautiful, young wife named Jennifer (Embeth Davidtz). It just so happens that she is enhancing the  passion of her life by participating in a torrid affair with someone other than her husband. This is a secret that Ted is  well aware of. Ted Crawford’s home displays elaborate kinetic structures, art that Ted has created. It’s a testament to  his keen intellect and he uses his intellectual skill to create the perfect crime: the murder of his wife. In fact, he
confesses his crime to Detective Rob Runally (Billy Burke).


It’s up to L.A. prosecutor Willy Beachum (Ryan Gosling), a very successful deputy district attorney, to prosecute Ted.  Willy is haughtily walking through his last week of work in the Los Angeles D.A. office, headed to a cushy job in
corporate law. He is cocky, arrogant and self-assured in his belief that this case is a slam-dunk.  His boss, Joe  Lobruto (David Straithairn) is not so sure that this young prosecutor should take this case so lightly. ‘Fracture’ is a
clever cat and mouse game and Ted plays Beachum perfectly. In film, we often find that the writer creates an  impossible trap for the hero (usually superhero).

The viewing audience is entertained by watching how the hero escapes. That is unfortunately, the only question  requiring an answer in many movies as the rest of the film is laden with special effects and leaden dialogue. This film
goes deeper, weaving a complex web that will hold your interest from start to finish. Some of it is a bit confusing and a  little perplexing. It’s all in the details. Watching Anthony Hopkin’s and Ryan Gosling’s work is worth the price of  admission. Does Ted succeed in the end?  You’ll just have to see this film and find out for yourself. It’s worth the ride   

Running Time: 113 minutes  
Four and a Half Stars out of Five  
Fracture is in Theatres Now and Will Be Available on DVD in August 2007
 


Allan Stanleigh also writes reviews for his own website: Reel Write Reviews www.reelwrite.com  Over 480 of reviews of films from 1999 to the present. *

Rollback by Robert J. Sawyer

In 2009 Dr. Sarah Halifax, a SETI researcher, decodes the first ever message from an alien race and sends them a  reply. Because the planet the aliens call home is so many light-years away she doesn't hear from the again until almost  40 years later, near the end of her life.

In walks a wealthy business man who is convinced that Sarah is the only person who can continue this long distance  relationship with the aliens. He offers to pay for her to get a rollback- an extremely expensive medical procedure that  literally rolls back the years for whomever gets it. Suddenly instead of being in her 80's Sarah will be 25 again, and she  will have a whole additional lifetime to communicate with the aliens. With some reservations Sarah agrees, but only if  the businessman will pay for her husband to be rolled back as well.

In an ironic twist of fate the rollback doesn't work for Sarah. She is still stuck at 80, counting down her lifespan in months  while her husband is suddenly 25 again. While Sarah and her husband try to figure out how they will cope wit their  suddenly awkward marriage Sarah tries to decode the most recent alien message before she dies.

This was an incredible book. My description of the plot really doesn't do it justice. On the surface it appears to be a typical  science fiction novel, the aliens, the wonky medical procedures, etc. But Rollback really isn't about any of that. It's about  the relationship between Sarah and her husband, how it has grown and changed over the 60 years of their marriage and  how they handle, as all marry couples handle, the crazy twists that life throws at you.

This is not to say it's sentimental at all. It manages to be a very touching love story, even as it addresses the hard truths about love, the infidelities and  disappointments. Add in a lot of intelligent talk about morals and ethics in a modern world that increasingly blurs the lines about what it right and wrong and you  have a great read.*

Renee  Mallett


Spiritual Tree

String of hair, free flowing there.


Why always construction, constriction on where
we can and can not go?

Want to know that I’m covered have the
freedom to discover life without suffer, to scour
the face of the earth.
Walk, fly, swim, to Japan, Spain, New York,
space; flying free in ecstasy in my dreams.

Send my body that has taught me constriction
causing friction between my mind, body, and
soul.
Spiritual karate and Tantric fiction are my true
religion.

Get high and don’t know where I am, like
everything is fresh again. Bright, breathing,
alive and all a part of me.
Eternally me, I am you. I am who?

Like a feather when I close my eyes, dreaming
I can fly away, from fear, to change the gears
simply with thought.
Don’t ask me how I’m taught because I did it all
for free. I didn’t go to University, no tutor or
mindless computer.

I’m free to create instead of debate on who
said this and who saw what first. What a rut to
be stuck, for me, strangled with force fed
knowledge.

Baby strong, you are a melody, Charity could
ring so sweet.

Busting free in this spiritual tree, roots planted
firmly in earth, ever open to the infinite sky.*

Charity West
Photo : Charity West


I ♥ Food

I have been eating disgustingly healthy for eleven days now. I know that isn’t really that long, in the big scheme of things, but it  feels like it has been a lifetime. It really is amazing how food affects every aspect of your life.

I dream of it.

There are six of us trying to fulfill the Body-For-Life program: 12 weeks during which you eat 6 small, healthy meals 6 days a  week (day 7 is “cheat day”), and work out 6 days a week. Admittedly, I am the reluctant member, having just done a month of  Cardio-Core Bootcamp. I feel I am in pretty good shape, and am really only participating because I need a break from liquor and I  want to support my boyfriend in his quitting smoking / getting healthy regime. That being said, I still want to succeed. And,  despite the fact that I have always eaten my fruits and veggies and whole grains, I am surprised at the changes I have felt thanks  to well-balanced meals with no added sauces/ sugar/ fat etc.

For the first four days or so, I was G-R-U-M-P-Y, and I wasn’t the only one. Several of us admitted to uncharacteristic temper tantrums. I think it was the sugar and caffeine withdrawals, but it really could have been from fat-detoxing or even some weird additive I’d become unknowingly addicted to  (aspartame, maybe?). Damn I was edgy. I pity the fools who cut me off in traffic.

And now, I’m getting to the point where I am never really hungry. To be honest, I kind of miss that feeling. Of course I was starving all the time at first, while my body got used  to the smaller portions. Now that I am eating frequent, small, nutrient dense meals, I am never really, truly hungry. And, just as I no longer feel the animal within clawing to  find sustenance, I no longer feel stuffed and satisfied. How tragic.

I am a true “live to eat” type person who generally eats well so that I can indulge when I really want it. This eating-to-live idea, while very beneficial to my metabolism, is  killing my love for food. I watch the food network and can feel the drool slipping down my chin. Now that is hot.

But, because I am a good girlfriend and friend, I continue to plan my meals in advance (how responsible and adult of me), imagine my brown rice is really a pile of salty fries  with ketchup on the side, and long for Saturday. Oh Saturday, how I will fill your time – with IHOP Swedish crepes for breakfast, a delicious fast food cheeseburger and fries  and Coke (oh, I miss the tingly sensation of pop) for lunch, beachside gelato for a snack, and hopefully something cheesy and carb-filled for dinner. Oh yes… It will all be mine.

I don’t know how much longer I can last at this. I miss taste-full food. I want to be hungry again. I want to be full. I want to want to eat my dinner.

Is it worth it? It’s too early to tell. Ask me again in two more weeks. If I’m not driving through a McDonalds in camouflage, the answer will probably be “yes”. Who knows –  maybe I’ll become a fitness and nutrition freak. It’s either that or I’ll have regressed back to my bad habit pizza three nights a week...*

Carolyn Sapach


6 Signs he’s into you

Of all the confusing things that men do, I think sometimes just figuring out if they like you is the toughest!  Most of us
have kinda figured out the general signs if he’s just not into us. But what about the signals he gives when he is into us? Are there little things he does to show he is digging our groove? I spoke to a few guys, and did a little visualization to  remember the guys in my life who gave off that vibe, and I came up with a couple subtle 
signals to look for. Keep your  eyes peeled, you never know if you are missing the signs!

1. He calls you
It sounds incredibly obvious, but it’s not. If he’s into you, he will call or text message often. This translates into the fact 
that he’s thinking about you and that’s a pretty good sign.

2. You make him nervous

Ever notice when you approach him he flinches a bit? Or maybe he stumbles over his words, or says silly things. Next 
time you are chatting with him, take note of his body language. If he’s leaning in slightly it might mean that he’s trying to  get closer to you, but just doesn’t know how to approach you. Give him a break and invite him to a party, or somewhere  where there will be lots of your friends so it isn’t really a date. While you guys are out hanging out, if he’s into you he’ll  likely be able to drink up the courage to ask you out, or let you know. If not, then no harm done, you had a good night out!


3. He looks you dead in the eyes when he talks to you

This can be very sexy, when a man stars intently into your eyes, with lust and passion. Or, it means he respects you (I prefer the first reason!). He is showing you that  he isn’t afraid to let you look into the windows of his soul (his eyes) and he wants to look into yours. How very poetic! Just make sure you don’t have any eye boogers…. not sexy

4. He remembers insignificant details about you

Let’s say you are having a conversation and you start telling a story, and he says “oh ya, I remember, this is when so and so said that”. He was listening to you when  you spoke and he actually remembers the details. That says a lot for a passing conversation. See what else he’s been listening too and drop a few hints like that you love tulips and that your favourite colour is green. Test him. If he “passes” the test, you know he’s hot for you.

5. He tells you personal stuff

No, I don’t mean he tells you that he sees a therapist or that he used to have a bed wetting problem, I mean he tells you stories about his friends and family, and  intimate details of his life. It says a lot for the average guy to open up. Men in general show less emotion than woman, so when he opens up and tells you how proud  he is of his little sister who just graduated from med school, or how cute is cousin’s new puppy is, you should feel privileged!

6. He talks about you to his friends
This may not seem like a big deal, but it is. For a guy to open up and share his thoughts and feelings about a girl to one of his buds means he’s thinking about getting  more serious with her. Most guys cherish their time with their buddies, and they often do the same sorts of things (play video games, go to the bar, play sports).  When  the conversation gets a little more serious, particularly when it comes to a girl, you better feel pretty good that he’s using that “special” time with his buds to talk about  you!

There is a multitude of ways he can tell you he’s into you. Some signs are easy to spot, while others will feel like the emotions came out of nowhere! It’s most  important that you know that everything happens the ways it’s meant to. If he ends up liking you and you like him back, great! If he doesn’t end up showing the affection  you had hope for, then it wasn’t meant to be. One thing I learned long ago was that there are very few people out there who deserve you to obsess over whether they’ll  cal or not. Just make sure to be open minded and honest with yourself about what you really want.  Sometimes you don’t get what you ask for on purpose! But if you do  get it, make sure to enjoy it for what it is, and not what it could be.*

Lisa Powell


It is not until you are a cashier that you understand the rage and frustration that you can feel  for total strangers.

You deal with a new transaction every 1-4 or 5 mins and it can be painful!

For the most part, my customers have been great. BUT...

Here are some of the things that I hate customers doing, in no particular order :

1. Coming to my till while you're on the phone...and staying on the phone the ENTIRE TIME only looking up to whisper 'on debit' - that's if you bother saying anything to me at all.

2. Pointing out that I charged you for the wrong thing while I have already made it obvious
that I am aware and am in the midst of fixing it. Oh you mean this case of soy milk ISN'T a bag of green beans?? YOU try memorizing 500 codes, ya prick.

3. Telling me, someone who bags 8 billion groceries a day, how to bag. I know the eggs don't go under the melon and I know when you bought nothing but 6 glass bottles of juice  they will need to be double bagged and guess what - if you insist on stuffing 10 items into  ONE bag, mention it BEFORE I divide the heavy stuff in half to go into two separate bags to
convenience you. Don't wanna layer those pears with a can of beans now. So I start over.  Nothing better than loading then unloading...then loading again. Douche bag.

4. Using your credit card like it's loose change. Here is a hint for you - if you are using a Visa to pay for your $1.79 bagel DAILY, maybe you should skip a day of eating out. Just a fucking  thought.

5. Speaking of loose change...ever try picking up 25 cents in pennies off a conveyor belt?  Put it in my hand or the counter. Bills are really no different - if one more person throws a $10 bill at me like I'm a hooker who gave them a good 5 mins, I'm gonna snap.

6. Speaking of conveyor belts...they have sensors.
When there is nothing in front of the
sensor, they move. So guess what? When you keep pushing back that can of pop thinking the belt will magically stop somehow, think again genius! I know it's your pop. The person in front of you doesn't want to pay for it, don't worry.

7. It's my break and I want to go and eat. Or even better yet, it's the end of my shift and I want to go home. I will finish taking the people in my line. So when I put up my sign, don't have a coronary. I see you. Put away that glare, shut up with that giant sigh and be thankful I am this nice.

8. Lack of patience! I have to ring thru your food, take your payment and bag your stuff. After I am done ringing it thru, I will take your money and then bag or maybe bag and money at the same time depending on how you want to pay. But guess what? I'm not Inspector Gadget and I only have two arms. If you don't like it, bag your own food.

9. Thinking the cashier is all knowing of every aspect in the store.
The codes are in the
computer. I scan the code and the computer reads it. If there is a mistake, it's not my fault. I can fix it but let's not act like I am out to get you and overcharge you $1.00 on your $15.00 package of nuts. Brought your bulk food item over and didn't write down the code? Good one. At the very least, know what you GOT. If you think I should know what type of yeast is in that bag when you don't even know, you're a moron. Or how about saying " Oh and my wife is bringing a small carton of milk over, too." And asking me if I know the bar code. Yeah I do know every 10 digit code for every item in the store because I'm a robot, didn't ya know?

10. Waiting until AFTER you've paid to change your mind about an item or point out a
mistake. If you think someone should be less than it is and you notice it, mention it BEFORE you pay. If you buy something then just change your mind 30 secs later , I can't just pop open the till and give you your money. There is paper work involved and I have a lineup which means, you are wasting my time. By wasting my time you are also wasting the time of people in line who will take their frustration for the situation out on me. So basically, go to hell.

Need more? No problem :

- don't leave your items on my belt and then walk away without giving notice to go oh say, make a salad, while people are waiting to line up. When I move your stuff, don't get all huffy  cos really, you're the idiot.

-don't forget your stuff! you came to get groceries so why are you walking out the door without them? you're absent minded, great. I don't care. but when you come back to pick your stuff up, don't act like it's MY fault you walked out the door without them the first time.

-you got a parking ticket cos you wanted to wander around the store aimlessly for an hr before you started shopping and ran out of time? not my problem. so let's not act like it is. Better yet, forgetting to give me your parking stub then coming back thru y till " weren't you supposed to ASK me for this?" No asshole, cos I don't care if you get your $1.50 back but obviously you won't be able to sleep tonight without it.

-coming through my till 10x in one day because you have nothing better to do. this doesn't really piss me off it just makes me sad. get. a.life.

- talking down to me because I ring your food through. I'd love to see you memorize 120 produce codes and scan a cart full of food in under a minute. Don't ever tell me what I "should" know. Don't demand I do anything - I know what my job is. And for that guy who came in last week suggesting I have something against "colored people", get fucked.

- Going about the paper vs. plastic debate like you're William Fucking Wallace. It's not a huge deal and if you were educated at all you'd know the best thing to do is bring your OWN bag - but if people don't, there's no need to be a nazi about it. Then again, I prefer you to the people who want plastic...double bagged...into paper. Remind me to print you a "fuck the earth" t-shirt.

Well my friends, I hope this has helped you see it from an EX cashier's point of view.Many of you won't care as I wouldn't have before I worked as one but know this - we remember faces.We remember faces, preferences and habits.If you plan on being a dick to your cashier, count on them remembering you when you come back and hope that one day they don't walk into your work and aren't the one you're "serving".

To any of the customers who fall into these categories, fuck you.

How's that for customer service skills?*


OVEN BAKED COOKIE

ALYSSA MILANO

We all watched her on Who's the Boss in the 80's and she has always been a doll.

From her questionable movie choices to her starring  role in Charmed, she has
remained so!

Look for her in the upcoming thriller Pathology.


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